For years, you have been the picture of success. The accolades, the promotions, the seemingly effortless navigation of a demanding career all painted a portrait of high achievement. You excelled, you delivered, you climbed the ladder. But beneath the polished exterior, a different story was unfolding. A story of relentless effort, intricate systems, and a constant feeling of swimming upstream. Then came the diagnosis: Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). For many late-diagnosed professionals, this revelation is not just an explanation. Rather, it is a profound re-evaluation of what “success” truly means.
We live in a society that often equates achievement with visible outcomes: the corner office, the impressive title, the overflowing bank account. Individuals with undiagnosed ADHD can become masters of masking their struggles, developing elaborate coping mechanisms to meet societal expectations. They might hyperfocus to meet deadlines, create intricate color-coded organizational systems to manage tasks, or rely on sheer willpower to push through persistent inner restlessness. These strategies can be incredibly effective, leading to outward success. However, the internal cost can be immense.
As Dr. Russell Barkley, a leading expert in ADHD, notes, individuals with ADHD often experience significant emotional dysregulation and difficulty with executive functions, including planning, organization, and working memory (Barkley, R. A. (2010). Taking charge of adult ADHD. Guilford Press.). Imagine navigating a complex professional landscape while constantly battling an internal whirlwind of racing thoughts, struggling to prioritize tasks, and feeling overwhelmed despite your outward competence. The energy expended on simply coping can be exhausting, leaving little room for genuine fulfilment and well-being.
Adults with ADHD often develop various strategies to mask their condition and to cope in social, academic, and professional settings. This “masking” or “camouflaging” is often a conscious or subconscious effort to fit in, avoid judgment, or meet expectations. An understanding of these “masking” or “camouflaging” techniques will provide an indication of the time and energy that many adults with ADHD feel they need to expend in order to survive, let alone succeed. Some common ways adults with ADHD mask their condition are as follows:
The person may develop compensatory strategies for coping with their inattention and executive dysfunction. Examples are as follows:
- Over-preparation and Planning: Meticulously planning and preparing for meetings, conversations, and tasks to appear organized and on top of things, even if it requires significant extra effort. This can involve creating detailed notes, rehearsing responses, and double-checking everything (Oxford CBT, 2025).
- Strict Routines and Schedules: Adhering rigidly to routines, using multiple alarms and reminders, and creating detailed to-do lists to compensate for difficulties with time management and organization (MentalHealth.com, 2023).
- Arriving Early: Intentionally arriving very early for appointments and events to avoid being late due to time blindness (Medical News Today, 2023).
- Writing Everything Down: Taking copious notes in meetings and daily life to combat forgetfulness and appear attentive (WebMD, 2024).
- Creating Organizational Systems: Developing elaborate filing systems, color-coding, and digital tools to manage information and tasks, often requiring significant time and effort to maintain (MentalHealth.com, 2023).
- Body Doubling: Intentionally working alongside someone else to maintain focus and accountability (ADDA, 2025).
The person may seek to mask their hyperactivity and impulsivity. Examples are:
- Suppressing Fidgeting and Stimming: Consciously trying to sit still, avoid fidgeting, and suppress stimming behaviours (for example, leg bouncing, pen clicking) to appear calm and focused (Medical News Today, 2023; Verywell Mind, 2024).
- Controlling Speech: Deliberately speaking less, thinking carefully before speaking, and avoiding interrupting others to appear thoughtful and in control (Medical News Today, 2023; WebMD, 2024).
- Suppressing Emotions: Hiding strong emotions or reactions to appear more stable and socially appropriate (Medical News Today, 2023).
- Avoiding Situations that Trigger Symptoms: Steering clear of crowded or overstimulating environments to manage sensory overload and potential impulsivity (Verywell Mind, 2024).
Other techniques often employed by adults with ADHD include social camouflaging, as follows:
- Mirroring Others: Consciously or unconsciously mimicking the behaviours, speech patterns, and organizational strategies of neurotypical individuals to fit in socially (ADDA, 2024; Psych Central, 2022).
- Practicing Social Interactions: Over-preparing for social situations and rehearsing responses to avoid saying the “wrong” thing (Oxford CBT, 2025).
- Staying Quiet in Social Settings: Avoiding conversations or speaking minimally to prevent exhibiting symptoms like talking excessively or interrupting (Medical News Today, 2023).
- Creating “Reasonable” Excuses: Developing explanations for lateness, disorganization, or forgetfulness that do not reveal ADHD symptoms (ADDA, 2024).
Many adults with ADHD also feel a drive to overachieve and to exhibit perfectionism. This is often achieved by:
- Overcompensating at Work/School: Working longer hours, double-checking everything, and striving for perfection to mask underlying difficulties with task initiation and completion (Oxford CBT, 2025; MentalHealth.com, 2023).
- Taking on Fewer Responsibilities: In some cases, individuals might deliberately choose roles or tasks below their potential to ensure they can manage them without their ADHD being obvious (MentalHealth.com, 2023).
It is important to recognize that while masking can be a helpful short-term coping mechanism, it often comes at a significant cost to mental and emotional well-being, potentially leading to burnout, anxiety, depression, and a disconnect from one’s authentic self (Oxford CBT, 2025; ADDA, 2024). Understanding the ways ADHD can be masked is crucial for recognizing the condition in oneself and others, and for fostering more supportive and understanding environments.
Many of these masking behaviours and coping practices are carried out subconsciously and often with little to no understanding by the person of why they feel the need to adopt these practices. Certainly, there is generally a lack of appreciation and understanding of the condition of ADHD in undiagnosed adults. As a result, the late diagnosis often triggers a period of reflection in the person. Professionals who once attributed their struggles to personal failings – laziness, lack of discipline, or simply not being “good enough” – begin to understand the neurological basis of their challenges. The realization that their intense efforts were, in part, compensating for underlying executive function differences can be both validating and unsettling.
Suddenly, the definition of success shifts. It is no longer solely about external validation but also about internal well-being and sustainable achievement. The question becomes: “Have I truly been thriving, or have I just been exceptionally good at coping?”
This rethinking of success can manifest in several ways:
- Prioritising well-being over relentless productivity: The drive to overcompensate can lead to burnout. A late diagnosis can be a catalyst for prioritizing self-care, setting boundaries, and recognizing that rest is not a luxury but a necessity.
- Seeking accommodations and support: Professionals may feel empowered to request accommodations in the workplace that were previously unimaginable. This could include flexible work arrangements, assistive technologies, or clearer task breakdowns.
- Re-evaluating career paths: Some individuals may realize that their chosen career, while outwardly successful, does not align with their neurodivergent strengths and preferences. This can lead to courageous career shifts towards more fulfilling and sustainable paths.
- Focusing on intrinsic motivation: The constant pressure to conform and compensate can overshadow genuine passions. Understanding their ADHD can help individuals identify and pursue activities and roles that genuinely engage their interests and tap into their unique strengths, such as creativity, problem-solving, and hyperfocus in areas of passion (Hallowell, E. M., & Ratey, J. J. (2010). Driven to distraction (Revised): Recognizing and coping with attention deficit disorder from childhood through adulthood. Pantheon.).
- Building self-compassion: Years of feeling “different” or “not trying hard enough” can take a toll on self-esteem. A diagnosis can foster self-compassion and a kinder understanding of past struggles.
The journey of a late-diagnosed, high-achieving professional with ADHD is one of profound self-discovery. It is often a journey that challenges conventional notions of success and highlights the importance of internal well-being alongside external accomplishments. Recognizing that years of “coping” don’t equate to “thriving” can be the first step towards building a more authentic, sustainable, and ultimately more fulfilling definition of success – one that honours neurodiversity and prioritizes a life lived, not just endured.
The GHS ADHD and Autism Diagnostic and Support Service
GHS Clinics will provide a comprehensive ADHD and autism diagnostic and support service. GHS will deliver a best-in-class, CQC-regulated service underpinned by NICE guidance, GMC prescribing standards, and international models from Sweden, the Netherlands and Canada. The service will integrate comprehensive diagnostics tailored to identify the specific signs of ADHD and autism in both men and women taking into account all the pertinent factors and issues, including the marked differences that can be present between men and women as set out above. The service will provide multidisciplinary care, and longer-term lifestyle, coaching, and nutraceutical support. The service will recognise that a late diagnosis of ADHD or autism in adulthood can itself be a very disturbing and troubling event, and will provide specialised care and advice on how to address and cope with this situation. The service is designed to exceed the expectations of discerning clients, with care pathways personalised to individual needs and underpinned by validated clinical scales (for example CGI-S, GAD-7), technology-enhanced data flows and the use of innovative predictive analytics powered by Vulcain causal inference tools.
References:
- Barkley, R. A. (2010). Taking charge of adult ADHD. Guilford Press.
- Hallowell, E. M., & Ratey, J. J. (2010). Driven to distraction (Revised): Recognizing and coping with attention deficit disorder from childhood through adulthood. Pantheon.
- ADDA – Attention Deficit Disorder Association. (2024). ADHD Masking: Does Hiding Your Symptoms Help or Harm? https://add.org/adhd-masking/
- ADDA – Attention Deficit Disorder Association. (2025). The Ultimate Guide to ADHD Coping Mechanisms: 19 Practical Strategies. https://add.org/adhd-coping-mechanisms/
- MentalHealth.com. (2023, February 15). What is ADHD masking? https://www.mentalhealth.com/library/adhd-masking
- Medical News Today. (2023, June 19). ADHD and masking: Why it happens, symptoms, and how to cope. https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/adhd-masking
- Oxford CBT. (2025, May 12). ADHD Masking. https://www.oxfordcbt.co.uk/adhd-masking/
- Psych Central. (2022, May 10). ADHD Masking: What It Is and More. https://psychcentral.com/adhd/adhd-masking
- Verywell Mind. (2024, May 10). ADHD Masking: Examples, Impact, and Coping. https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-adhd-masking-5200863
- WebMD. (2024, September 13). What Does It Mean to ‘Mask’ Adult ADHD? https://www.webmd.com/add-adhd/mask-adult-adhd